Recently, I started a new health regime.

It ’s pretty simple: I workout 30 minutes a day at my gym and have to burn 300 calories. My reason for doing it, like most people, is to get fit and become healthier. I just turned 40 last year, so staying energetic is becoming more of a priority. This reasoning makes a lot of sense, and I am getting a lot of encouragement from the people in my life.

But here’s the thing: it’s bullshit.

It sounds impressive that I want to be fit and healthy and invest in myself. But there is a deeper reason underneath.

The real reason I want to get back into shape is that I don’t want to be average.

As I look around the world today, most of the people I see are in less-than-stellar shape. Especially beyond the age of 35, most people let their physical appearance start to decline, and they give in to looking average.

I don’t mean that this is a bad thing. I understand there is more in life than being in top physical condition. However, I realized recently that for me, it is important. For whatever reason, call it competitiveness, ego, a need to be different, I somehow don’t like to look at myself and feel like I am the same as everyone else. I want to feel in command of my physicality when I am speaking, and I want to feel good in the clothes I’m wearing.

Just writing that out is somewhat embarrassing. But it’s the truth.

And here’s the weird part: when I admit it that this is the real reason behind the reason, it is much easier to stay motivated to my goal. Every day when I don’t want to go to the gym, I ask myself if I want to be average. Do I want to have the same physique as everyone else?

That triggers in me a different feeling of determination and focus. And this underlying desire to not be average is what keeps me going back to gym — day after day.

Over the years, I have noticed that whenever I’ve broken up from a relationship, the next few months I am able to make massive progress and change in my life. I get in shape, my business booms, and I start doing exciting new things. Part of it is because I want to change, but a bigger part of it is because I want to show the person that they lost something special. Again, this is embarrassing to admit, but it’s the truth.

I wanted to share this because I think it’s an integral part of the motivation we all feel towards our goals and plans.

Whether we admit it or not, there is often a deeper reason driving everything we do. Sometimes it’s even embarrassing to admit it to ourselves, but it’s there, and it’s actually running the show.

Look at your current goals, or plans you have. Ask yourself why you’re doing it. You will likely have a good logical, generic reason. Then, ask yourself again. What is the reason behind the reason you want to achieve something?

Be honest about your real reason. Embrace it. Let it come to the surface, and you will achieve more and have an easier time staying on your path.

Even though it might be embarrassing to admit, the reason behind the reason is your true driving force.

When you embrace it, it will help you become what you truly want to be.